The Family

...yes on.

Anywho- actually talking to Gordon about how it stinks knowing i don't have all you guys around to play Peggle with, look for in the art comp lab, ask to play nurse on me, cry ridiculously with, irritate beyond all measure, laugh hysterically with, or force to make me a mochchinolattenonfatcarmelpoopoo. It may have not been those precise words... but yeah. Chicago has been great and all... i have the boy and a couple people to hang out with once and a while. The reality of knowing i will never have you all and my other close friends all in one place ever again is shitty. I know i'll "grow up" and have neighbor friends... or some couple we end up playing Scrabble with.. or friends of my children's friends... all things creepy and strange... none things quite as great as our camping trips, or movie nights, or megan/karyn (WE ARE THE SAME PERSON!!) is crying again lets do something about that nights.

Guys... i am so aware that if i don't marry this boy it will be the BIGGEST mistake of my life. Karn met him... she can vouch for his being intelligent, attractive, and nicest boy in the whole world... he even thinks it's funny when i fart. I am alarmingly calm about this. I am so used to relationships where i am dating someone because i am not sure wether or not we could get married someday... i am now in a relationship where i am absolutely sure we could get married someday... and i totally want to. OMG OMG OMG. And yet... totally comfortable. I go to school with kids barely 21, and am so totally aware of why i don't want to date these guys. Though attractive, intelligent, and talented... they are immature in a way in which is only appealing for something short term. Even marriage crazes at HU or any ideas of marriage i had there seem immature. I am almost 23 and totally ready to settle down in the next few years. haha-with a Gordy. (PS no one calls him that.)

Professionally, i have had a lot thoughts about that too. I am in a class working with the South Side Community Art Center. We are currently writing proposals in order to get funding for projects we are heading. CRAZINESS. There are a couple kids who have done this before... and are recieving a $10,000 grant to actualize their project for a teenage designed greenspace in thier community. I am trying to help this dilapidated art center that is of great historical significance. We are tearing down plaster, replacing the gallery and enrtyway drop ceilings with drywall, and completely gutting a room to make a better storage space for their secondary collection. HOLY CRAP... Tues we were down there having a meeting with a preservationist from the museum and i told the curator of the center that i keep feeling more responsible and less capable. I am having meetings... i am contacting people... OMG OMG OMG i am networking. How did i just grow up?? WHY DO I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!?!?! It is exhausting and overwhelming but i want the responsibility to look back and say, wow... look what i AM capable of. (haha now pay me...)

And i already shared my studio excitment... i'll have more pix in a few weeks... i'm going to to a trial install in a week and then one for Midterm crits a week later.

BUT yeah... that's all i'll say for now. i know at least karyn will read it. ^_^ love you all very very much.